Jennifer Carr

The Pains by Jennifer Carr

Oh no! It’s happening again –
My chest tightening
the tissue dying
The coronary artery
suddenly becomes blocked
stopping the flow of blood
to my heart muscle
damaging it
The pressure like an elephant
sitting on my chest
Heart beating faster and faster
as the window of opportunity
to breathe
narrows
as I become
more nervous
Medical professionals call this a Myocardial Infarction
Lay people say a good ol’ fashion Heart Attack
I just want this pain to go away

 

Oh no! It’s happening again –
My chest tightening
from the tears, the triggers
the angst, the anxiety
The innocent mind
suddenly becomes blocked
stopping the flow of happiness
The damage, the deficits
fragmented memories of trauma
setting off a chain of events
like a ton of bricks on my chest
Heart beating faster and faster
as the window of opportunity
to breathe
narrows
as I become
more nervous
Medical professionals call this a Panic Disorder
Lay people call this crazy – some say anxiety attack
I just want this pain to go away

 

 

About Jennifer Carr

Poetry written by Jennifer Carr. Jennifer lives in Santa Fe, New Mexico and enjoys spending time with her partner and two children. She is an EMT and firefighter. When she is not working at the local hospital, she spends way too much time writing poetry. Her poetry has been published by Triumph House Poetry with a Purpose. Her poetry has also been recognized by ZenUnleashed, Fanstory, as well as several newspapers. She loves flying by her own wings and looks for any opportunity to soar to new heights. Don’t forget to follow her on Twitter, @PoetryHaiku13.

How I Finally Became a Mom by Jennifer Carr

Seasons came and went
As did 15 years of my life
During that time I was told
Some people are not born to be a mo
That I was not born to be a mother
I heard that lie so many times
I convinced myself of that truth
Like inmates convicted for crimes
They believed they didn’t commit
I was not better than those convicted
Those convicted in her eyes
Incarcerated in her crippling care
The cage that clipped my wings
The yard I yearned to feel the sun
Stopped my dreams in mid flight
No longer was the sky the limit
I could not see pas the bars
She enslaved me in
And yet, I loved her
And would have died for her
In fact, I almost did several times
After death comes rebirth
Then comes that newfound hope
Hope which brought courage
Suddenly I had not fear
It took me 6 months
Of carefully laid out plans
To plan my escape route
But it paid off
It all paid off
I broke free from that cage
And learned to fly once again
No more solitary confinement
Today, 7 years have passed
And the greatest gift
Besides my freedom
Is the sounds of small fee
Running around
With their blessed hearts
Because they have made me a mom
That’s right, I was born to be a mom
God knew all along
He would bless upon me 2 children
When the time was right
After I was able to leave
My jail cell behind me
Because the sentence time
Wasn’t mine to have to serve

 

 

About Jennifer Carr

Poetry written by Jennifer Carr. Jennifer lives in Santa Fe, New Mexico and enjoys spending time with her partner and two children. She is an EMT and firefighter. When she is not working at the local hospital, she spends way too much time writing poetry. Her poetry has been published by Triumph House Poetry with a Purpose. Her poetry has also been recognized by ZenUnleashed, Fanstory, as well as several newspapers. She loves flying by her own wings and looks for any opportunity to soar to new heights. Don’t forget to follow her on Twitter, @PoetryHaiku13.

Shorts by Jennifer Carr

The Volunteer Firefighter

Tones awaken my ears
Dreams on hold at 3 a.m.
Dispatch gives the details
On the next call as
I kiss my wife goodbye

 

The Matador

Tired of fighting
life’s bulls
one after another
please
take this red cape
away from me

 

Breaking Free

Years passed
till one day –
courage found
to break free
from the cage
Now a backbone
with wings

 

Feeling the Heat

Her touch
Shows no mercy
Just like an arsonist
It only takes striking one match
The orange glow of gluttony in her eyes
Setting my whole world on fire
The flames dance in delight
Burnt in my mind
Her touch

 

About Jennifer Carr

Poetry written by Jennifer Carr. Jennifer lives in Santa Fe, New Mexico and enjoys spending time with her partner and two children. She is an EMT and firefighter. When she is not working at the local hospital, she spends way too much time writing poetry. Her poetry has been published by Triumph House Poetry with a Purpose. Her poetry has also been recognized by ZenUnleashed, Fanstory, as well as several newspapers. She loves flying by her own wings and looks for any opportunity to soar to new heights. Don’t forget to follow her on Twitter, @PoetryHaiku13.